Addiction can be psychological, physical, mental, spiritual and other

Addiction can be psychological, physical, mental, spiritual and other


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Home Page > Self Improvement > Addictions > Addiction can be psychological, physical, mental, spiritual and other

Addiction can be psychological, physical, mental, spiritual and other

Posted: Feb 26, 2012 |Comments: 0

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Addiction can be psychological, physical, mental, spiritual and other. It is something to which I have become personally acquainted with on  many levels. I desire to bring this to you that you may understand and know, you are not alone. I fight an inner craving for the narcotic and if I have knowledge of it’s presents, and they are within my reach, I will take or steal them to get the feeling that these drugs offer.

I first became familiar with narcotics in 1996, just before I became licensed as a pastor. The physical problem I have is a condition known as “spondylitis”, which effects the lower lumbar and was caused from a childhood injury. I never had it looked at or repaired, as it didn’t become symptomatic until my mid forties. The first time I was given a narcotic, I felt like never wanting to return to reality. The pain from the condition I had was secondary to wanting the drugs. Eventually, over time, I became addicted. The drugs would run out, but than, whenever there was an incident that I needed pain killers, it all started again for me and I would be on them for as long as the doctor would provide. This happened more than I can count and each time, it was harder and harder to get off the drugs. Of course, no one knew about it, because I kept it my little secret.

There were times I would go to the prisons and would have to teach a class or give a sermon and I would be under the influence of pain killers. I carried on with life and the drugs were a part of who I was. From the time I started the day, until the day was done, I was on drugs. I was taking 5 times the prescribed amount and the doctor never questioned why I was going through so much. I didn’t feel guilty or question to myself that it was wrong. I rationalized the drug consumption to seriousness of my condition, which could have been taken care of with surgery easily, but I never considered that option, as I wanted the drugs.

The doctor eventually had to shut me off and that was when the world seemed to end. If you have ever become addicted to narcotics, you can’t understand the physical and emotional roller coaster that takes place to come off the addiction. It is a life changing experience, with the mind playing tricks and body sweats. You swear to yourself, once you are off, that you never want to go through that hell again. It never last though, and given the opportunity to take them again, you don’t hesitate for a split second. This is the mental addiction to the drug. You somehow justify it to yourself that you need them for some problem, even if you have to make something up, just to get that feeling one more time. It is a road that only the addicted can relate to and we all agree with the same emotional mind game that these drugs play on you.

I will never be freed from the mental addition of wanting narcotics. Just recently, my wife had major surgery to remove a large mass from one ovary. She came home with percocet, the addicts drug of choice. I can remember the trip my mind put me through, thinking of how I was going to enjoy taking them. She never knew that I took about 6 of them….from the first bottle. The second was different. She sent me up to the walmart to get them. I can remember that there were 15. When I got out to the truck, I opened up the sack, being careful not to rip it while taking out the staple. I took one and replaced the staple. A week later, when she was ready to start on the second bottle, she noticed one was missing, and I was discovered! I confessed to her my problem and addiction. Thankfully, I had not taken enough to experience the physical dependency, but the humiliation was bad enough. I was thankful that she found out, because I feel as though I am not in this battle alone. For Now, I believe I am done with drugs, but I can’t say for sure. Knowing my wife is there to help and that she knows not to leave any drugs around where I can find them is helpful. If I were to every have surgery or need pain killers, she will step up and let the doctors know about my dependency to them.

To the one out there who is battling with this problem, my heart and prayers go out to you. It seems as though, you will never wake up from the nightmare you live in. For your own sanities sake, you must realize that it can’t go on forever. To get caught was helpful for me, in that someone else is in this with me. To realize that you can make it with the help of others is powerful and may be just what you need to start the ball rolling, or in this case, to stop it from spinning. Take it from a friend. There are ways out, but you must take that first step and let someone know. Trust me, life will begin knew and fresh when you do.


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About the Author:

My name is Douglas B. Fossett. I live in the great mid west. Nebraska to be precise. I am 52 years of age and have been married for 27 years, to the same women. We have three children and they are all adults and very successful in what they do and my wife and I have always been proud of them. I received a license to preach the gospel in 1997 from First Baptist Church in Bellevue, Ne. I have preached and served in the prison ministries for a period and have ministered to many lost souls over the years. I drove a Taxi cab for almost six years and while doing this, started a large bible study for cabbies. Please visit our website at www.canigotohell.com

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I am an under-graduate in physics and currently pursuing psychology through distance learning. Based out of India and looking for summer programs abroad for exposure. Need help!
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My name is Douglas B. Fossett. I live in the great mid west. Nebraska to be precise. I am 52 years of age and have been married for 27 years, to the same women. We have three children and they are all adults and very successful in what they do and my wife and I have always been proud of them. I received a license to preach the gospel in 1997 from First Baptist Church in Bellevue, Ne. I have preached and served in the prison ministries for a period and have ministered to many lost souls over the years. I drove a Taxi cab for almost six years and while doing this, started a large bible study for cabbies. Please visit our website at www.canigotohell.com
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